Lost In A Book
by Greysanatomymeanttobe
Summary: RSS gift for Hedwighood. Prompt: Lost In A Book


**Hey! This is my Rumbelle Secret Santa 2K15 gift for Hedwighood, who is a wonderful giftee and an amazing person :)**

 **Prompt: Lost in a book**

Rumplestiltskin hates christmas. It is the one day a year, he is in an even worse mood than his boy's birthday. Most people notice his nasty mood days before the actual blasted holiday itself, the memories of only decorating the old cabin he used to own with his little son flashing through his mind is enough to make his blood boil with anger and frustration at anyone around him. Which of course only were the poor people thinking to strike a deal with him that would change their lives 'for the better'.

But this year he barely realises the snow falling down from the sky or the people in the nearby town hanging up decorations and singing carols. His mood is chirpy instead of frustration and his usual anger caused by the actual guilt he feels, because for some reason he doesn't think of that when he sees his maid walk in and pour him tea or dust his collection. He always keeps his eyes on his spinning wheel, but it is as if he can feel her glances burn through the leather of his vest. He has never thought having a maid would be this exhausting, but it is. Always reminding himself to keep spinning and not look up from his potions when she walks into the library, always reminding himself not to glance back at her as he leads her somewhere or to focus on his deals as she walks passed in the entrance halls on her way to the upstairs corridors. It literally would be less work to do all the cleaning himself without magic.

Truth be told he is starting to get attached to the girl and her sweet giggles, how she doesn't seem to mind talking to him and how her smile seems to light up when he walks in a room. He has no idea why, maybe she is planning something he doesn't know about or she is secretly sneaking off somewhere that he has no idea off and that's how she manages to act to be happy to see him, but he still hasn't found out what. It should frustrate him, not knowing, but even though his thoughts tell him to watch out for her - that whatever she's doing could be dangerous, his heart smiles back. After all she has done to tidy up and cheer up the place, Rumple had expected christmas decorations and even more humming than usual, but instead, he starts to see the girl less and less often. She seems to disappear for long amounts of time, yet every time he calls her, she shows up, so she couldn't be sneaking out of the castle. It shouldn't bother him, after all if she would be doing it he'd probably be snapping at her for doing so, but it does.

Belle used to love christmas. She loved waking up early and running downstairs to the huge christmas tree in the ballroom, seeing her mom already awake before her, baking christmas cookies. Her mom had loved christmas even more than she used to and always tried to spread the cheer to everyone in the village, holding huge balls for everyone to attend with great food, drinks, dancing and music. Belle had loved it all. But when the Ogre wars started, she couldn't stop thinking about all the people dying and all the children having no christmas at all. She felt horrible, but tried to keep a straight face and act like she was enjoying it for her parents. She tried to act like a smiling royal princess during the balls, but couldn't help but notice the lack of men and the shrinking amount of guests. She knew she had to act like everything was fine and be a good princess by keeping up the fate of the people.

But this year she doesn't have to worry about keeping up appearances; she's the Dark One's maid and she is pretty sure the Dark One doesn't celebrate christmas anyways. So she spends most of her days reading in the library he was so nice as to give her. She doesn't have to think about all the deaths, all the people dying or all the children being at home wishing that their father would come home for christmas. Or question why the master of the castle makes her smile so much, why he makes her heart flutter and her cheeks flush. All she has to do is focus on the words and flee to another universe. So she does for days as the 25th of the month seemed to doom over her, reading page after page and book after book. Living and reliving far off places, daring swordfights and magical spells, everything but thinking about Christmas.

Rumple lost his maid again. She isn't in the kitchen, nor the great hall or any of the rooms downstairs. As he browses over places she can be and reasons she can have for disappearing, he realises with a startle that today is christmas. He stops walking as he lets that realisation wash over him, waiting for the guilt and pain that he is sure would come now he knows, but strangely enough it stays away. What does make him feel guilty, and this is even stranger, is that Belle is probably sad somewhere thinking about her first christmas without her family. And he resents the feeling. He is the dark One and Dark Ones don't feel pity for a stupid maid. A prisoner. They just don't.

Grumpily he returns to his spinning wheel, to try and forget the last five minutes of thoughts, and forces himself not to think about Belle being upset somewhere in the castle. _Blasted girl. Always messing with my emotions._

While spinning, he still can't help but think about it, think about her and how to make it up to her. He doesn't know why, seeing as he has nothing to make up for - she might be his prisoner but it had been her choice and he had made up for it by keeping the ogres away from her kingdom, but he still wants to. He shouldn't do anything big, the girl might mistake it as _kindness_ , but he should at least keep her company on this holiday that's all about not being alone. He doesn't know if she'd like his company right now, who would, but maybe he can make her laugh again, seeing as she seems to do that a lot around him.

When Rumple finally finds her in the library, laying on the chaise longue in her favourite blue dress and her book in her lap, Belle expects him to get mad at her for neglecting her duties, but instead he has a soft smile on his face. He just stands at the top of the stairs leading to the circular room watching her with interest. Belle looks up at him, feeling like she has to give an excuse for not giving the table it's weakly scrub or not having washed his clothes yet, but the way he silently starts to circle her, makes her keep quiet. As he sees him walk around the chair watching her in amusement, she can't help but feel the corners of her mouth curl up, even though she feels horrible.

She figures he is just going to work at some potion or spell, so she focusses on her pages once more. Rumple sits down at his desk, still not tearing his eyes away from her and not knowing what to say, so he just stares at her as she keeps turning pages. Once she notices he's still watching her, he can see her cheeks starting the flush. The temperature in the room must be flailing, because there could be no other explanation for him getting chills, even though it was his magic that kept the whole castle warm even in winter.

"Belle." As she looks up, she can see the pupils of his reptilian eyes dilate and she can feel butterflies in her stomach. "I'm sorry you can't be with your family today."

Surprised and taken aback at the apology, she blinks a few times confused at him, not knowing what to say. Of all the things she had expected, she had not expected him to apologize, not because he isn't a decent man, but because as the dark one he would have to keep up his 'reputation'.

"I-uh.. Thank you, but you didn't take me away from much. This is the first christmas after my mom's death, it would've been depressing either way. Besides, I don't like christmas anyway." She looks away from his gaze uncomfortably, letting her eyes glide over the bookcases in front of her. Rumple hadn't expected this answer at all, especially the not liking christmas part. He watches the girl as she shifts uncomfortably in the chair and without thinking he replies; "I used to love christmas with my son." He winces as the words leave his mouth, not knowing why he had just revealed that part of - very - personal information to her. He wants to shut down completely and start barking to her again so she would never mention having heard him say that ever, but seeing her look up at him with a soft smile, he realises why he had said it in the first place. To cheer her up and to have a conversation with her.

"I used to love it too, until the ogre wars started. I just couldn't enjoy pastries in the palace while children were out there crying about their fathers." She looks down at her feet again, feeling a wave of sadness wash over her. Rumple frowns; is that why she's so upset? He stands up from the table and walks over to her as she looks up at him confused from the chair. Rumple can't help but notice how cute she looks like this, her head perked up and a small frown above her beautiful blue orbs, but dismisses the thought immediately as he sits down besides her. Again it surprises him how she doesn't seem to shake out of fear or even disgust and how she doesn't scoot away from him at once. Belle doesn't understand what he's doing, but his facial expression looks kind and even a little upset after her declaration. She watches curiously as he takes her book that had ended up at the other side of him and opens it at a random page.

"Don't worry." He reassures her with a teasing smile. "I'm not going to do anything to your precious books." Belle's lip perks up a little as she looks at his face with interest, trying to read his facial expressions. He moves his hand over the page and tells her to look down. Rumple feels his heart clench as he hears her little gasp, something he had only heard once before; when she had fallen into his arms, the clumsy little thing. An image appears where the letters used to be, an image of a little girl and boy celebrating christmas with their parents. Belle watches surprised as she recognises the streets behind the window of the little home as her own village, feeling a tear well up as the scenery changes to another family also celebrating christmas together.

"Wai- How…" She stumbles over her words confused, not knowing what to ask first, but feeling like crying out of happiness.

"How?" Repeats Rumple with a soft voice instead of his usual high-pitched teasingly one. "Because of you, Belle. Because you sacrificed yourself for the men's safe return home to their families." Rumple still could barely believe someone was brave enough to make that sacrifice, feeling great sympathy and respect for the young woman, though he would never admit it. He recognised what kind of hero she actually was probably more than anyone, because he had lived in a time where there wasn't someone as selfless as Belle. Belle looks up at Rumple with tears in her eyes and for a second he's scared that he had upset her, but then to his great surprise, she wraps her arms around him.

"Thank you." She muffles close to his ears. "Thank you for showing me this. And thank you for what you did for those people."

Rumple slowly wraps his arms around her as well, still starstruck that this girl had the audacity to hug the most feared magicien in all the lands, but nothing that this girl does seems to surprise him anymore. At her exclamation he pulls back, but still holds on the her arms, so he could look her in the eyes with a frown. He gulps as her blue eyes sparkle back at him, again with that beautiful smile of hers. "Me? I didn't do anything."

"And yet, you did. You cared enough as to use your magic to do it. You can't say you just did it because you needed a maid." She smiles at him teasingly, feeling her heart warm up at his confused expression. Right now he doesn't look like an evil wizard at all, but he looks kind and cute - the man behind the beast. She never actually got why people call him that or why people seem to fear him. Sure at first meeting he had seemed intimidating, but not evil.

Rumple frowns as he ponders over those last few lines, the thought about what he had actually done never coming through to him, because he still believes that Belle is the only hero here; a hero wouldn't ask a person to be his servant to save thousands of lives. He knows that he couldn't have done it without naming a price - magic always comes with one, but would he have done it if he could?

He dismisses the thoughts out of his head and looks back down at the brunette with the beautiful smile, a little confused as if he had forgotten that she was there. Belle can see he's uncomfortable, so she tries to change to topic to make him feel better; after all he had done the same thing. She stands up, taking Rumple with him, seeing as he's still holding her arms in confusion, but also because he didn't want to let go yet, loving the way his hands burned from touching her soft skin.

"Would you care to dance, kind sir?" She asks with a small giggle as she pulls away from his hands and makes a bow, remembering the time he had bought her a rose, not looking away from him.

Rumple stares at her, his mind turning into a mushy mess, not knowing what to do. He's confused about why she even would ask him, but he nods with a frown as he can't disobey while she's smiling at him like that. He bows in return and takes the hand she offers him, while with the other he waves his fingers to make music boom through the library. He looks at her in awe as she places her hand on his shoulder, inviting him to carefully place his on her hip. Belle looks up at Rumple with radiant smile as he starts to lead her on the rhythm of the music and steps a little closer to him, closing in the gap between them.

 **Okay, so at one point during writing this I was just like 'I'm gonna make 'em dance.', so I did. I don't even know why, but I just needed the fluffiness. I also kind of took the 'lost in a book' part a little literal, but I hope that's alright. Here you go, Hedwig! I hope you liked it :)**


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